What to do when your dog hates your holiday guests
Holiday events are our dog Bear’s worst nightmare.
Extra people in his space, too much commotion, new smells, and wayyy too much energy. He will never be the type of dog who wants to be the center of attention. If he were a human, he would be the last to arrive, first to leave, and most likely to find a quiet corner with a close friend. That is if he showed up at all. We’re working on getting him comfy with little bits of chaos, but for him, it is a very slow process. In the meantime, we have plenty of ways we can set him up for success so he doesn’t flip his lid. If your pup is like Bear, then following this advice is for you!
First off, don’t feel bad if your dog is anti-social or afraid of people they don’t know.
Plenty of dogs feel that way! We don’t need to force our dogs to be something they are not. Instead, take stock of where they are now and work within their comfort level. There are many phases to the this process, so take it one step at a time!
Phase 1 = “Prevent and avoid until you can Teach”
If you just got your dog, they are just now starting to show signs that they are not comfortable with holiday chaos, or if you’re unsure how they’ll react, preventing and avoiding may be your best bet. That way you can protect their state of mind and keep them from compiling further evidence that people are a threat. There’s a handful of ways you can do this:
- Volunteer to host at your house NEXT year. This year, team up with a family member or friend and host the party at their home. You can tag team the shopping, decorating, cooking, and/or cleaning, but without adding that stress to your pup.
- If that’s not possible and you have to be at your house for whatever reason, tuck them away in a safe space when the party is happening. We always recommend crate training for all dogs, especially those who are insecure, anxious, and/or aggressive. Having them in their crate in a room that is farthest away from wherever the party is happening will be your best bet. You can put on a white noise machine or music to help hide the noise. Tell your guests that the room where your pup is in is off limits. If you’re concerned that any of your guests will ignore this boundary, either lock the door or do not invite that person. You probably don’t want them there anyway if they’re not going to listen to your house rules……..
- Another option is to have them hang at someone else’s house during party time. Whether that’s with a neighbor, friend, or family member you and your dog know and trust. Be sure to take your pup over to that place a handful of times before the party day to get them used to that space.
- The last option, which for some may be the best option, is to board your dog with a trainer. One of the many reasons we love that we can take on a couple pups at a time for boarding in our home is so our client doggos have a safe, chill spot to hang while their owners focus on other life things like holiday parties. And their owners can focus on their guests instead of worry about what their pup is doing! Keep in mind that traditional boarding facilities may also be too much for your nervous pup, so if you don't have a trainer you trust, keeping them home may indeed be your best bet.
Bonus tip for this phase: What happens if you need to get your dog out to potty while the party is happening??
Use a leash! The last thing you want to do is release your pup out into the party without a safety net. Ask your guests to keep your path to the door clear, go to your dogs' crate, leash them up BEFORE letting them out of their crate, and walk them outside to do their business. After they’re done, right back to the crate. Be calm, confident, and relaxed during this potty break, especially if your dog is nervous. If you are talking to your dog in a high pitched tone and are nervous yourself, your dog will have a hard time keeping their cool. Dogs are very sensitive to energy!
Phase 2 = “Teach until you can trust”
The teaching phase begins well before the party starts! You’ll want to build up your relationship with your dog and teach basic skills like Markers, leash skills, door manners, and even some basic obedience like "Down" and "Place" can help. If your dog is a bite risk, muzzle training is vital as well!
- Markers are short words/sounds that we use to let our dogs know when they’re doing well and when they need to change course. We teach four markers to start: "Yes", "Good", "Ah-Ah", and "No". That way we can guide our dogs through any situation.
- Leash skills are important! When you start bringing your pup out to join the party, it will be best for them to be on leash, so you can use the leash as guidance when needed. If they don’t know how to follow leash pressure and/or get wigged out by it, that will only make things worse! So teach them how to follow the pressure in a low stress setting first!!
- Door manners are key for safety! WIth people coming and going and potentially leaving doors open, you need to make sure your dog isn’t going to dart out at the first opportunity, especially if they are scared!
- Basic obedience commands like "Down" and "Place" can be helpful for some dogs! Some dogs appreciate having something else to focus on, while others feel stuck and that can make things worse, so be mindful of how your pup feels about these things and use them accordingly.
- And finally, muzzle training is a great skill for any dog, but in particular for bite risk dogs. Using a muzzle is a great way to keep everyone safe. But! Like everything else, you need to make sure they’re comfortable with the muzzle prior to using it at a party! If you only use the muzzle in stressful situations, your dog can start to think that the muzzle = stress which will set you both up to fail.
As you're working on those basic skills, you also must decide what you’d like your pup to do during parties ideally - Where do you want them to be when guests arrive? How do you want them to greet said guests? What would you like them to do while the party is happening? Once you’ve decided how you’d like your dog to do all the things and everyone in your household agrees, then it is time to teach!
Run through every scenario from people walking up to the house to them leaving. Invite a friend or two over at a time to practice each step of the party process until your dog is comfy with those people. Then continue to add until you have a full blown house party. Remember you may have to take steps backwards and then forwards again! Be super vigilant about how your dog is feeling and adjust accordingly.
Last thing, be realistic in your expectations!!!!! Bear, for example, never will be the type of dog to hang out while there is a raging house party going on. And if he were to be, it would take an insane amount of work to get there. There are times to push your dog outside of their comfort zone so they can grow, but don’t push too far. Take your time, go at your dog’s pace, and respect their boundaries!
Hope this breakdown helps you put together a game plan for your holiday festivities with your nervous pup!
If you need help, we have plenty of program options to give you the education and support you need! Our online Basics Course Bundle will help you establish those basic skills your dog needs for every aspect of life, plus the support of our Client Community where you can ask questions and post videos for feedback as well as take advantage of Community events!
Or if you'd like personalized support, we can always do one-on-one training via Virtual Coaching or our In Person Programs.
Visit www.dogseyeviewtraining.com/devonline for our online course catalog or www.dogseyeviewtraining.com/start to get started with a one-on-one program!
And! We’re running a special through Black Friday! 20% off all of our training services! Use code BF2024 for the discount on the course, or schedule your Consultation by midnight on Black Friday to get that 20% off any of our programs!
Happy Training!!
-Kate
